This week was definitely full of the unexpected–which is why I’m posting this today instead of Thursday.
Among many other things that are not usually part of our schedule was, a last minute trip to visit my husband’s parents, people coming to cut back our large oak that had already spread into our neighbor’s property (it lasted a good part of the day), and a prayer gathering at our home.
And to top it off, I spent an entire day asleep on the couch with a fever.
Thankfully, it was just one day. And no Coronavirus. No other symptoms except those that accompany a fever. However, God taught me a lot that day (but that’s for another article).
So, here’s the challenge for week #3.
You already know the Characteristic for this month:
Characteristic-A Wife that Encourages
What have you found the most difficult about these challenges the past 2 weeks?
I think, for me, it has been continuing to be intentional in the middle of the mundane.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the routines of life and almost slip into an automatic mode; doing what is necessary to get from point A to point B.
Simply going through the motions.
But a wife who is just going through the motions is not a wife who is intentionally encouraging her husband.
But that’s where the amazing grace of our Lord comes in to help us break through the monotony of doing the same thing over and over.
There are many, many ways that we as wives can encourage our husbands. The past couple week have been how we can encourage through our words.
But this week will be the opposite.
“Know this, my beloved brothers, let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to wrath, for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” James 1:19-20
This week let’s encourage our husbands by being quick to hear.
Practical Way to Show Love
As I was first typing this article, my husband arrived home early.
He sat down next to me on the couch and began to share with me details from his day, an update on a possible mission trip as well as last minute details for the prayer gathering we would be having in our home that evening.
I have a very Martha personality and my natural response is to try and multitask–continue typing and “listen” to him at the same time.
And this was especially the case since I was terribly behind on everything.
So, there I was with my computer in my lap and my fingers positioned to type.
And I thought, “No. Your husband is more important than this article. And he deserves your full attention. What he is sharing was important to him and so that automatically means it should be important to me-Why? Because Jonathan is important to me. And if I continue typing, I’m not showing him that he’s the most important.”
Have you ever had one of those moments?
You’re in the kitchen or working on some task when you’re husband starts telling you something?
What’s your most natural, common reaction?
Do you stop everything you’re doing to give him your full attention or do you continue the chore at hand and “listen” to what he’s telling you?
I know for me, it’s the first that comes more naturally.
But I definitely know what I think and feel when my husband or another person doesn’t give me their full attention-I consider it to be rude and think: what I’m saying is not that important to them.
And that’s exactly what we express when we do it.
Obviously, there will be some things that we cannot stop in the moment. A suggestion for what we can tell our husbands in those instances is “I really want to give you my full attention so could we talk in just a few minutes when I finish _______? Or is it something you need to tell me now?”
I believe that the majority of our tasks can be delayed a few minutes. Especially if we put them in a balance and weigh what’s the bigger priority-the task at hand or our husbands.
So, starting this week….
…When your husband tells you something–BE QUICK TO HEAR. Be an interested, sincere, active listener.
When your husband is taking the time to share something with you, that means it’s important to him, even if you don’t consider it to be.
If necessary, ask God to help you to have a sincere interest in his conversation.
And remember to always listen through the rose-colored filter of Philippians 4:8:
“Whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praise worthy, meditate on these things.”
As wives, we encourage our husbands when we are quick to hear because we communicate:
“What you are saying is important to me because YOU are important to me.”
Date of the Week
Get out some snacks, put on some calming instrumental music, light a candle and share your dreams with one another. They can be as small or as seemingly unreachable as you can imagine. Share your personal goals, dreams for the future, desires for your marriage, your dream home, dream vacation etc. Pray and ask God together what plans He may have for you as a couple. And maybe you can put pen to paper and make a plan of how you can accomplish one of those dreams/desires together.
This is a perfect opportunity to be quick to hear.
And remember -this is an opportunity to get to know your husband more!
Give Thanks for Him.
As always, we need to be thankful for the time that we are blessed to enjoy this life with our spouses.
“Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:4
Give thanks and pray that your husband would delight himself in the Lord and experience the joy of walking closely with the Creator of the Universe and in so God will fulfill the desires of his heart.
If you haven’t already check out: